Lisa Hurst joined the Petra staff early in 2008. She graduated from Reading Area Community College with an Associates Degree in nursing.…
Planning Your Wedding
Weddings are special occasions. They mark the beginning of a life-long partnership between a man and a woman under the Lordship of Jesus Christ. If you choose to be married at Petra, we aim to do everything possible to ensure that your wedding goes smoothly and is a source of joy to everyone. Following are some guidelines as well as an introduction to our wedding coordination packages.
General Wedding Guidelines
1. Any committed Christians who consider Petra their church home may get married at Petra.
2. The church will provide a pastor to officiate at the service. The couple may ask any of the pastors at Petra to perform their wedding. (Please be aware that Pastor Lester will be performing fewer weddings than he did in the past.) If the couple does not request a preference for an officiating pastor, one will be chosen for them. A non-Petra pastor may officiate at the service if requested and it is approved by Pastor Titus Kauffman.
3. Engaged couples who get married at Petra are required to go through premarital counseling with an assigned Petra couple who has been specially trained for this purpose. These couples have a special desire to help young couples enter into a strong marriage. The couples will meet together for approximately eight sessions prior to the wedding and will continue their relationship after the wedding. Pastor Titus Kauffman will pair each engaged couple with a counseling couple.
4. We require that every couple getting married at Petra use a Petra wedding coordinator. If there is an offsite wedding or only the reception is at Petra, a Petra wedding coordinator is available but is not required. The coordinator is a qualified member of the congregation who knows the facility, the policies, and the people. You may request any of the Petra coordinators or you may enlist your own wedding coordinator, but that coordinator will have to defer to the Petra coordinator when it comes to facility use and policy. (Coordinator packages are listed later.)
5. The use of the facility will include: Sanctuary, two dressing rooms, and use of the Multi-Purpose Room and/or Café with kitchen for a reception. The couple is responsible to set up for the wedding and to return all Petra furniture and decorative items to their original locations after the wedding. The couple is also responsible to assign someone to tidy up and gather up belongings after the service and/or reception.
Wedding Application Guidelines
1. Call the church receptionist to inquire about the availability of the church for the date or dates you desire. She will enter a tentative date for the wedding on the church calendar, schedule your initial appointment with Pastor Titus Kauffman, and send you a packet of materials which will need to be completed for your appointment with Pastor Titus Kauffman.
2. The Wedding Packet you will receive in the mail will include the following materials:
• Wedding Overview
• Ceremony Planner
• Ceremony/Reception Information
• Ceremony Outline
• Premarital Counseling Questionnaire/Interview*
• Reservation Form for the Use of the Church Facility*
• Wedding Coordination Form*
• “Twelve Reasons” sheet*
*Please fill these out and bring them to the initial premarital visit with Pastor Titus Kauffman.
Note: The Reservation Form can be given to the church office during your appointment with Pastor Titus.
3. At the conclusion of your first appointment with Pastor Titus, and with his consent, the wedding date will be confirmed on the church calendar. Pastor Titus will confirm the officiating pastor at this time.
4. A copy of the Reservation Form for the Use of the Church Facility will be given to Petra’s wedding coordinator. She will then call you to discuss your wedding and review your facility needs.
5. A copy of the Premarital Counseling Questionnaire/Interview will be given to the pastor or pastors who will be officiating at your wedding.
6. You will be matched with your premarital counseling couple and you should contact them to set up your first appointment.
7. You will meet with the officiating pastor and the wedding coordinator approximately four weeks before your wedding. Please call the pastor to set up the meeting date. Plan to bring along a completed ceremony/reception info sheet and ceremony outline.
Petra Facility Provisions
1. The Sanctuary seats 1,600 people.
2. The center aisle of the Sanctuary is 120 feet long. There are six steps leading up to the stage which may be used by the wedding party to stand on during the ceremony.
3. The Multi-Purpose Room accommodates a maximum of 250 people. The food line can be set up in the lobby area.
4. The Café can accommodate 150 people.
5. There are two candelabras available for use at your wedding. The coordinator will show you how to insert candles for the candelabras.
6. Other furnishings available for wedding use include a table for the unity candle and a podium for using the guest registry.
7. All kitchen items are available for use, including the punch fountain (no pulp and no red punch), large coffee urns, and chafing dishes. These items are to remain at Petra. Items must be cleaned after use and placed in the kitchen exactly as they had been stored. Petra does provide silverware, but does not provide dishes, glasses, cups, or paper goods.
8. Nurseries are available for childcare and/or nursing mothers; however, these rooms must be reserved ahead of time. Guidelines for the use of these rooms will be given at the time of your reservation.
9. A Petra wedding coordinator will be available throughout the rehearsal and wedding ceremony, and they will attend the reception if asked to do so. The Petra wedding coordinator will attend to all questions regarding the use of the facility.
Wedding Rental Fees
The Petra facilities are available for rental for engaged couples who regularly attend Petra or are members on mission assignment or away at school. The cost to rent the facilities for your wedding is described below with a listing of services included. Note: There may be an extra charge if additional hours are required by church staff.
Sanctuary Rental= $250.00
Includes:
• Rental of sanctuary and changing rooms
• Rental of kitchen and room for rehearsal meal
• Reserved set up time the day before the wedding
• Services of a wedding coordinator for the rehearsal and wedding (average 12 hours)
Note: A wedding coordinator is also available for reception if requested - see Wedding Coordination Packages below
• Services of Audio Tech for rehearsal and wedding (average 5 hours)
• Services of cleaning staff (average 3 hours)
Does not include:
• Extra tech support for running song show plus or other extras
• Honorarium(s) for officiating pastor(s)
• Clean up of items such as flowers and other items brought in for the wedding
• Basic tidy up and replacement of sanctuary chairs that have been moved
Reception Room Rental = $100.00
Includes:
• Rental of reception room and kitchen for rehearsal meal and reception
• Tear down and services of cleaning staff for reception (average 3 hours)
• Reserved set up time the day before the wedding
• One microphone
Does not include:
• Initial set up of tables
• Audio tech support unless contracted at set fee
• Basic tidy up and clean up of items such as flowers and other items brought in for the reception
Additional Notes:
• Suggested honorarium for officiating pastor is $100-$150. An additional honorarium at your discretion ($50-$75) would be appropriate for other pastors who participate in a lesser role.
• Additional audio tech hours are $20.00 an hour. Assistant tech is $15.00 an hour.
• Availability of offsite audio equipment is at the discretion of the audio director and is an additional $75.00 fee. This does not include the additional cost of audio tech time.
• Petra sound technicians must run the Sanctuary sound equipment. Sound systems in the Multi-Purpose Room and Café may be run by volunteers.
• If multiple media is used there may be a need for another sound tech to be present and paid.
• Two services that Petra does not provide are videography and creating Power Point presentations. Power Point presentations can be used, but the couple will be responsible for creating them through an outside source.
Wedding Coordination Packages
Package A: Ceremony only
(10-12 hours average – provided by the church at no cost)
1. This package includes coordination through the rehearsal and wedding ceremony.
2. The Coordinator will call the couple and review the services to be provided.
3. The Coordinator will meet with the couple and the officiating pastor again approximately four weeks before the wedding to refresh them about the church facility, policies, wedding items, etc.
A) Show the couple through the church to familiarize them with the facility, procedures, and location of items they may need.
• Show the location of the dressing rooms to be used.
• Show the couple the location of the unity candle table, the podium for the guest registry, and gift table if applicable.
• Show the couple the location of extra round tables, etc.
B) Review expectations about the payment of fees for Petra services.
4. Review with the bridal couple/family on rehearsal day to answer questions about the facility and make sure all details are coming together.
Package B: Ceremony and Reception
(Total of 18 hours – provided by the church at no cost)
1. This includes all the services of Package A plus coordination throughout the reception.
2. Check all details at the reception site, including, but not limited to:
A) Introduce self (coordinator) to the reception manager/caterer/DJ.
B) Gift table
C) DJ – Make sure the DJ has all the necessary information (bridal party names, order, etc.)
3. Watch for the bridal party to arrive and line them up in order to enter the reception.
4. Designate a person to secure the building after the reception.
Package C: Complete Wedding Planner
(discuss fee with coordinator)
1. This includes all services in Option 1 & 2 and is available for a bride who needs assistance in planning her wedding from beginning to end. This would include but not be limited to shopping with the bride, picking out dresses, flowers, invitations, decorations and planning the ceremony details.
2. This option can be discussed with the wedding coordinator to determine the amount of time/help the bride would need and the associated cost.
Preparing Your Marriage Vows
Your wedding vows consist of two parts - the vows you make to God, and the vows you make to each other. Several sets of vows are given below as options from which to choose. If you choose to write your own vows, they must be approved by the pastor. Remember the vows you make are serious and binding before the Lord and need to express a solid biblical commitment to marriage.
1. Vows to God
Pastor to Groom:
“_____, do you take _____ as your wife, to love her even as Christ loved the church, to protect and care for her, as long as you both shall live?”
Groom to Pastor: “I do.”
Pastor to Bride:
“_____, do you take _____ as your husband, submitting yourself to him as unto the Lord, showing reverence to him as head of this union, as long as you both shall live?”
Bride to Pastor: “I do.”
2. Vows to Each Other
These can be memorized, read, or repeated after the pastor.
Groom to Bride:
“I, _____, take you _____, as my wife. I promise before God and these witnesses to be your loving faithful husband, in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow, in adversity and in health, as long as we both shall live.”
Bride to Groom:
“I, _____, take you _____, as my husband. I promise before God and these witnesses to be your loving faithful wife, in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow, in adversity and in health, as long as we both shall live.”
3. Alternative Vows
A) Vows to God
“_____, will you have _____ to be your wedded wife/husband, to live together after God’s ordinance in the holy bond of marriage? Will you love her/him, comfort her/him, honor and keep her/him, in sickness and health, and forsaking all others, keep yourself for
her/him only, as long as you both shall live?”
“_____, do you take _____ to be your wedded wife/husband? Will you love her/him, comfort her/him, honor her/him, and respect her/him? Will you share your hopes and dreams, your achievements and disappointments with her/him, and keep yourself for her/him only, as long as you both shall live?”
B) Vows to Each Other
“I, _____, according to the will of God, take you _____ to be my wife/husband; to laugh with you in joy, to be a strength to you in trial, to grow with you in love, and forsaking all others, I join myself to you, to be a husband/wife to you. From this moment forward we are one.”
“_____, I love you and today I vow my life to you before God and our friends and relatives. I promise with the help of the Lord Jesus to be the husband/wife God wants me to be. I promise to walk in the Lord’s ways that I might be all that is rightfully expected of me as your husband/wife. I promise to stand with you in whatever paths the Lord leads, and to be faithful to you, for as long as we both shall live.”
Planning Your Ceremony
This is a basic outline to help you in your planning. You are allowed to make changes and additions. Share your ideas with the pastor in charge of your ceremony for his insights and approval before you finalize your plans or complete your printed program. Above all else, we want God to be glorified in the ceremony.
Basic Ceremony Outline:
Prelude
Processional
Welcome and Prayer
Giving of the Bride
Sermon Meditation
Exchange of Vows
Ring Ceremony
Candle Ceremony
Dedication Prayer
Declaration of Marriage
Presentation of Couple
Recessional
Postlude
A Detailed Look at Your Wedding Ceremony
PRELUDE
Music can begin 15-20 minutes before the announced starting time of the wedding.
If several CD’s are used, it’s helpful to burn all the songs onto a single CD in the order they will be played. Solo tracks can be kept separate.
Prelude music should be timed out to get a more precise idea of when to start the prelude.
The last prelude song should begin at the scheduled starting time of the ceremony or a few minutes thereafter.
During the prelude the candelabra’s can be lighted.
On the last song of the prelude the following should be done in this order:
• Program attendants ushered in
• Gift receivers ushered in
• Guest registrars ushered in
• Grandparents ushered in (optional)
• Groom’s parents ushered in
• Bride’s mother ushered in
• After the mothers have been ushered in, they light the two end candles on the unity table and then are seated.
• If a floor runner is used, it is rolled out now or just prior to the bride’s entrance.
• Ushers sit down unless they are in the bridal party.
At the end of the prelude, the pastor, groom, and groomsmen enter the Sanctuary and take their positions up front.
Special singing should be placed toward the end of the prelude or later in the ceremony so that the majority of the guests are seated to enjoy it.
PROCESSIONAL:
The processional usually includes two music parts.
On the first song the bridesmaids enter beginning with the last one and ending with the maid/matron of honor. On this song the flower girl and the ring bearer also enter.
On the second song the bride and her father enter and walk slowly to the front of the Sanctuary. The music can then be faded out.
Everyone remains standing.
WELCOME AND PRAYER:
Pastor gives a brief welcome and opening prayer. He then asks the congregation to be seated.
GIVING OF THE BRIDE:
Pastor will ask: “Who gives this woman in marriage?”
Father will respond: “Her mother and I.”
Father then kisses the bride and is seated.
Groom steps forward and the bride takes his left arm. They then move up to the platform with the best man and maid of honor on the top level with the bride and groom. The rest of the bridal party are on the steps.
SERMON MEDITATION:
If you have a preferred Scripture text you would like to have used in your wedding, let the officiating pastor know well in advance. The sermon will be about 10-15 minutes. The bridal party remains standing during this time.
EXCHANGE OF VOWS:
The vows are in two parts. The first part is your vow to God asked by the pastor. The second part is your vow to each other expressed by memory, reading, or repeated after the pastor.
If you want to write your own vows, you must have them approved by the pastor.
RING CEREMONY:
The pastor will give a brief explanation of the symbolism of the rings.
The pastor will then take the ring and give it to the groom and say, “_____, take this ring and place it on _____ left hand and repeat after me. “As a symbol of my love and covenant with you, I give you this ring.”
The pastor will do the same with the bride.
Note: Some couples do not have the ring bearer actually carry the rings, but instead give them to the best man or place them on the candle table.
CANDLE CEREMONY:
Some couples like the pastor to give a brief introduction to the significance and symbolism of the candles - the symbolism of two lives becoming one and the light of Jesus in the center of this marriage.
Other couples prefer to move directly into the candle ceremony without comment.
Some couples like to share communion together at this time. You can do this by yourselves or the pastor will serve you. Let him know how you prefer it to be done.
You are responsible to provide the bread and juice for communion.
Plan a CD song or special music for this time.
DEDICATION PRAYER:
For the prayer you can either kneel or remain standing and the pastor will dedicate your marriage to the Lord.
Sometimes the parents or the bridal party will join the pastor and lay their hands on the couple as well.
If you want to have someone else pray in addition to the pastor, let him know.
DECLARATION OF MARRIAGE:
After the candle ceremony, you will face each other and join your right hands while the pastor pronounces you husband and wife.
The groom then kisses the bride.
PRESENTATION:
You then face the congregation and the pastor says: “It is with great joy that I now present to you Mr. and Mrs. _____________.”
RECESSIONAL:
You should plan for a rather lively song on which to exit.
As soon as the song begins, the bride and groom and then the bridal party exit walking briskly.
The pastor will exit after the bridal party.
The ushers take the bride’s parents out and then the groom’s parents.
The grandparents can be ushered out. (optional)
The ushers release the immediate family.
POSTLUDE:
You need to decide if you will have a receiving line for the guests to go through or a general dismissal and greet the guests later at the reception.
Some couples choose to dismiss the guests themselves, row by row. This takes less time than the receiving line.
If you are planning a formal receiving line, you will want to plan for some extra music for those still seated in the congregation.
One of the ushers can give announcements if needed.
Marriage License Information
You can apply for your marriage license on the second floor of the Lancaster Courthouse, 50 North Duke Street, Lancaster, PA, 17602, Monday through Friday from 8:30-4:30. You must go in as a couple to apply. Note: There is a fee of $40 (cash only) when applying for your marriage license.
You will receive your license the same day as when you apply, however the license will not be valid until after three days. The license is good for a period of 60 days.
If you have been married before or if you are under the age of 18, call the courthouse for additional information before you apply. You can call the courthouse at (717) 295-3522.
God bless you as you give special preparation to your wedding day, and to your marriage!